Question by laura seeks the Kwisatz Haderach: He wants sex “every day,” multiple times even…HELP?
I have this amazing man in my life that will soon become my husband. He is the most perfect man to me, except he wants sex every single day. I know to most men this is a perfect dream, but it is not to women. We do not function that way. Anyway, we do not argue or fight except about sex. If I do not give him sex at night he wakes up mad and disappointed and makes me feel really bad. It’s everyday, not every other day, every day, sometimes several times a day. I am becoming so burnt out on sex that I no longer crave it, I dread it. I have talked to him till I am blue in the face, but he doesn’t seem to get it. He says that sex with me is magical, that’s why he wants it all the time. I need help, I no longer see that “magic” in our sex. What can/should I do? Please help with some advice. I will not leave him for this, but I am starting to question how things will be in the future…
Thanks every body. Your advice helps. I think we will have a long talk and possibly seek pre-marriage counseling.
Best answer:
Answer by HanZ
tell him to use his hand or see a sex therapist.
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He is A sex addict but he won’t tell you do it again but do it horribly then he will never want it again or slap him silly.
Wow. I think you both should see a counselor together. This could potentially be a sign that he’s a sex addict. Good Luck to the both of you though.
make the sex bad
no worries…he’ll find someone willing to do it every day…whether he’s with you or not
Girl, I’m going through the same thing with my guy. We figured out that talking about it beforehand instead of just ‘Hey lets go have sex!’ works a lot better and not taking too long every time helps too.
Maybe he’s addicted. Try and talk to him. I think you’re lucky because for me its quite the opposite.
you can just have sex with him, but do it poorly. then maybe he’ll realize you really are burnt out, and he’ll think theres no point in having sex if he doesnt feel any ‘magic.’
thats what i’d do.
There is really nothing wrong with him. That is how most guys are. when I got married, we use to have sex at least twice a day every day of the week and even on my third of 4th day in my period. Now we have been married for 2 years, and the sex is still good but it went down to only few day s a week, so you dont need abot the future because it will go down
He is a sex addict! I think you should consider leaving him. If he isn’t happy with you besides when you have sex with him, he doesn’t love you. He just wants your body. Sorry to say that but it is probably true. He may not admit it though. Are you talking about just sexual intercourse or both oral and intercourse? Try just giving him a hand job or something with lotion. If you do oral, I can’t remember what it is called but my ex used to put mints in her mouth and give me oral. AMAZING!!
But again I am saying this, if he is only happy when you do sexual activities, he does not truly love you.
Hope this helps! Good luck
I think you should give him a message that if sex is like an everyday activity,it’s not rare,and it’s not magical anymore.you should talk to him maybe in a really soft voice so he will listen and know exactly how you feel.Because if you dont let him know how you feel,this will be worse once you two get married.And,you might want to replce sex with something else to satisfy him,maybe some other activities for you two to be together,but not sexually,maybe like do something he likes,basketball,bmx,whatever.And do things to keep busy,so he wont have too many times thinking about having sex.
WOW things can really get bad for y’all in the future if this keeps going on i really don’t know what to say except that HE IS a sex addict and so he might need help hun = /
Everyone is different about these things. Typically men at younger age want it very often and the younger women are less so. At some point it starts to flip the other way (but not always). While this may seem somewhat excessive, it’s not really that uncommon for younger guys. Try and find a middle ground. Do it as often as you want/feel comfortable. If you are not in the mood and he is, either assist him in some other way of meeting his wants without having to include you completely. If that’s not possible or an option for that day/time, then he can always take care of himself if he really has to have it that often. If that’s not acceptable, then he’s not thinking of your needs and only his and may be a big red flag on whether you two should marry or not.
I’ve read/researched a lot about older couples who have been married for many years and have sex problems (It was for my male/female communication class in college). Normally, in situations like this, after 10 or 15 years the women simply refuses any physical contact at all, and may start sleeping in a different room. She just becomes so she can not even handle his touch, or hug, or anything. Your problem is not an easy fix, but left unfixed you could both be headed to a very unhappy marriage.
I would very strongly suggest getting some pre-marital counceling. Any problem you have will only be magnified when you marry, you really want to fix this one before you marry! A marriage councler has dealt with many couples with problems like this and can guide you on effective ways to deal with it based on both of your personalities. For example, he might help your mate discover there are other ways to feel “magical” with you, than just having sex. A few months now in marraige counceling could save you many years of marriage counceling in the future! If you cannot find one for free from a local church, I would suggest dishing out the money. Your marriage is worth the extra cash!
Tell Him That You Don’t like it! If He wants to have it Everyday, Tell Him That You’re Sorry, but You’re Busy or Not In The Mood For it! And Tell Him That You Hope That He’ll Understand!
I think I’m in the minority here, but I think that this is one that maybe you should go with him on. He will slack off after a while, but be pleased that he finds being with you desirable.
Maybe you could satisfy him in other ways that might not be as taxing, eh?