How I Lost 18 Pounds in 2 Days; Diet & Exercise Had Nothing to Do With it

just wanted to curl up in a ball, go to sleep and not wake up. If suicide was an easy thing to do, and did not affect other people in your life, then there was a part of me that would have definitely done it.

Lost in despair I did not know who I was anymore. I was lost with no direction. I did not fit in anywhere and I was too embarrassed to go out and see my friends because I looked so overweight and felt ‘ugly’. (I did not know at the time but I was going through a tremendous spiritual awakening and as a result everything in my physical world was being torn apart to be ‘re-built’.) I became so lost that one time I remember driving the car to the supermarket to get some groceries as my fridge was empty. I could not find a car park and became so angry that I simply drove home without any food. I had looked down at my swollen stomach and burst into tears. For a period of 8 months I had also buried myself in alcohol to numb the pain – to stop feeling. My self esteem was rock bottom. I was too embarrassed to be seen. Instead I buried myself in research.

I sold my four wheel drive, got an old bomb to drive around, cut all my overheads took a part time job and spent 25 hours a week researching. I was determined to find answers about what was happening in my own body. In 1998 I had attended a metaphysics course that basically said that we create our reality from our thoughts and feelings. What we think about is what we create. This had made sense to me but purely on an intellectual level. I remember walking out of that workshop recognizing that I had created all the good things in my life but I found it very difficult to comprehend that I would in fact have created all the injuries, chaos and pain in my

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