be.
Once a Friend-Now a Foe
Have you noticed you’re still using some of the same behavioral strategies to get what you want as an adult that you used in your youth?
Playing nave. Being passive-aggressive. Manipulative. Moody. Sarcastic. Confused. Spacey. Overly sexy. Other kid tactics: Pouting. Flirting. Whining. Complaining. Hiding. Running away. Giving up. Fantasizing. Acting dumb. Having accidents. Getting sick. Playing tough. Acting the fool. Telling white lies. Acting like a victim. Pretending you’re someone you’re not.
Do these tactics work currently in your adult life to create what you really want-loving mutual relationships, lasting support from people and the universe, vibrant health, boundless energy, real joy? Usually not! Since the circumstances and nature of our adult challenges have changed dramatically since we were young, most kid strategies are no longer appropriate or effective. In fact, these old tactics now get in the way of reaching our goals.
Why Don’t Childhood Successes Work for Adults?
Because any behavior that is unconscious and automatic can’t adjust to new, different and changing situations. So, these conditioned childhood survival strategies come back to haunt us when we use them as adults-like disruptive ghosts from the past. As adults, we still seek to be liked, to be included, and to make the grade at work. But instead of applying fresh intuitive responses that are